judge john hodgman podcast transcript
], [Struggling to get the words out through laughter] Yes! Okay, look. Sean? If you don't listen to it, And Stephen also put this question to no less than Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg! The Power Struggle Behind Who Does The Dishes with John Hodgman For the past 10 years, actor, author and humorist John Hodgman has hosted the podcast "Judge John Hodgman" where he helps friends, roommates and romantic couples negotiate their long-standing quibbles: Things like: "Which one of us is loading the dishwasher right?" To me, this satisfied that a hotdog is, literally and figuratively, a singular thing unto itself. I mean, by no means am I a logician. It's your judge, John Hodgman. Just because you're near him? Touch. And along with all the other ethnic immigrants, right? Do you feel that maybe... you are too concerned about what people are thinking? Next question. Oh, I think that was the press release from Farmer John's Hot Dogs about breaking ties with Dodger Stadium. Because when you go to MaximumFun.org/join, you're helping them make a living. Oh, excuse me! Well, Casey clearly has a lot of, uh, anxiety and trauma over bending the rules, so I think it would be a really natural way for him to help confront his fears and grow. There's actually a little bit of a—[chuckles quietly] of a disagreement. If you've listened through all of this stuff, maybe we've already convinced you. Have your pressing issues decided by Famous Minor Television Personality John Hodgman, Certified Judge. [More laughter.]. MaximumFun.org/join is the way that you can bring someone into the community who might not be able to afford to support us in the way that they might want to. Casey, Sean, please rise and raise your right hands. You exploit chaos where you can. I bet I don't understand it correctly. And you're doing it in service of what? —and, uh, it was a nice, nice way of enjoying a hot hot dog. And a six-foot-two guy coming up and obviously lying about his daddy having his ticket, [stifles laughter] that's a flag for them! Sean: Actually—which actually taste better than Dodger Dogs. [Jesse and John laugh.]. Television comedy writer Elliott Kalan and acclaimed illustrator Tim Miller team up in this clever comedy of mistaken species identity. More praise for Horse Meets Dog: “Horse meets Dog! Kalan meets Miller! Have your pressing issues decided by Famous Minor Television Personality John Hodgman, Certified Judge. Go get—[stifling laughter] go get a pin. It's a hamburger. We'll do all of TP123, not just the first half. "I can't imagine a worse idea than making your adult birthday party making other people watch your favorite movie after you give it an introduction," [laughing] but Elliott is so great, and this movie is so great, that he somehow pulled it off. Right. _[_Someone laughs.] Even subs! Like, it's very possible—you're a young man. Sometimes we believe we can see the best path for our loved ones, but at the exact same time we want them to be in control of their own lives and choices. That counts towards the goal. —who works for a law firm that represents the Dodgers can go into. Yeah, just boost a buck a month! To hear that your friend is feeling anxious and upset by your... Sean-antics? It has caused me to be a little bit—a little bit bolder. I understand why you are upset. THAT IS ALL. I can see why you feel a little unnerved! Yet, says Margaret Bendroth, the past tense is essential to our language of faith, and without it our conversation is limited and thin. This accessible, beautifully written book presents a new argument for honoring the past. I think it is both. Okay. [More laughter.] That's at MaximumFun.Reddit.com. And you cannot argue that we at MaxFun do not have our fingers on the pulse of American culture. But that you would be like, "Daddy's holding my tickets, and I just—can you just let me down? His birthday party was... him showing The Taking of Pelham One Two Three, his favorite movie, and giving a, uh—[laughing] what can only be described as a Turner Classic Movies–style introduction to the film. It's, uh, the Hebrew National brand, from the supermarket. Really, really good hot dog. And they deserve to make a living! And so, you know, just by being with him, I feel like I am breaking the rules, and it's causing me discomfort. Okay. Well, that's—look at you two, Mutt and Jeff! Now it seems like I'm copying Casey. [More laughter.] Judge John Hodgman is a podcast where John Hodgman decides real personal disputes, with the able assistance of bailiff Jesse Thorn. That's how I feel this should be, this family." Membership at Maximum Fun starts at $5 a month. That's the big difference between Dodger Dogs and non-Dodger Dogs. I decided to apply the basics of deductive logic that I learned in seventh grade, and have never thought of again, and barely remember. I just mean on the Titanic, the—the upper class—[stifles laughter] the altitude is totally reversed. I don't—I haven't shown the people the video, so... Sean, it looked like you drove to Dodger Stadium. I must say, that if it wasn't for the Maximum Fun network, I'm not sure that I ever would have taken an interest in podcasts or started this show. We'll see what the judge has to say about all this when we come back in just a moment. Same guess. But you, as a human, deserve some self-respect. Not the part where you're fishing hot dogs out of a thermos with some chopsticks! This book was written to inform readers that Patois is a written language which can be learned and spoken like any other language. This American Life receives an emergency transmission from a rooftop somewhere in New York City, where John Hodgman reports on the true-life origins of Christmas traditions. [Chuckles.] ", [Laughs; normal voice resumes.] What happens after you put the hot dogs in the foil? We had to create a whole other podcast! These are the two weeks—this is the second one!—in which we come to you and ask for your support for the community of artist-owned, listener-supported podcasts that make up Maximum Fun. Found insideWINNER OF THE 2020 PULITZER PRIZE FOR POETRY Finalist for the 2019 National Book Award "100 Notable Books of the Year," The New York Times Book Review "By some literary magic—no, it's precision, and honesty—Brown manages to bestow upon ... I mean, she... interviews the litigants, pre-interviews the litigants and writes up all kinds of notes for Jesse and me so that we know what we're talking about. [Laughs.] Sure, you can physically cut a hotdog in half. [Someone laughs quietly.] So Sean, when you hear that, how do you feel? Where we answer your small disputes with quick judgment. I'll be lucky if I'm the Jack Klugman of podcasts, honestly. This is a—cartoon characters! Okay. They get less quiet as Jesse speaks.] If you'd like John Hodgman to solve your pressing issue, please contact us HERE. So, I'm trying to understand. Because at that time, hotdogs and hamburgers were exotic! [Stifling laughter] I—I see them in the sense of a reverse class system. Yes, you used to be able to move around the park, uh, at your whim. And I feel seen by the judge. That's Two, Podius. If you'd like John Hodgman to solve your pressing issue, simply email it, along with your phone number, to [email protected]. And then when you get down to the lowest level, it's all you can eat, and there’s a whole buffet, and there's prime rib and all kinds of crazy stuff down there. They come down from a different culinary cultural and historical tradition. You're a grown man. Uh, that really put me on shaky grounds. Submit your case here! Remember it. Casey, Sean, thank you for joining us on the Judge John Hodgman podcast. Easternmost in quality, westernmost in exclusivity! A story about baseball, family, the American Dream, and the fight to turn Los Angeles into a big league city. Dodger Stadium is an American icon. But the story of how it came to be goes far beyond baseball. I grew up going to baseball games at Candlestick Park in San Francisco, where it was cold and miserable, and there were about 11,000 people in a 45,000-seat stadium. And... you know what? If there is anything! Alright. In his 34 years in law enforcement, Norm Stamper participated in — or approved of — the gassing of protesters "hundreds" of times. Anyway, you get it. 27 languages. And I tried to get you—I said, "Save it for the air, you guys! Hodgman was featured on the track "Question and Answer Time" on MC Frontalot 's 2010 album Zero Day. Sean: [Laughing] I'm getting the dogs out from their—their temperature-controlled thermos. Found insideMost of all, these stories celebrate love as it exists in real life: a silly remark that leads to a lifetime together, a father who struggles to remember his son, ordinary moments that burn bright. Where you go out to the baseball game with your therapist, and just talk the entire time? [Clip audio stops.] Indivisible. They let you down to the lower levels." It is okay for things to be different things. [Jesse laughs, John stifles laughter.] And I didn't remember this! Is it that you believe this class system should be abolished? I feel you, because as folks who are listening know, we now have a virtual courtroom where I can see everyone. The point I'm making is we're in the midst of this interim hot dog period at Dodger Stadium. It can be both. But I won't stop saying that a hotdog is not a sandwich. I did not know at the time that that question had been roiling around in sports Twitter and on ESPN for years. Or would challenge my automatic acceptance of rules that are arbitrary, or unfair, or purposefully exclusionary. He. But what we do know, and the point, is that the sandwich came to the United States in the 18th century, from England, just like the founding fathers... and the sandwich also owned slaves, and hated taxes. - Luister direct op jouw tablet, telefoon of browser naar "The Cop Who Realized The Bad Apple Was Him" van With Friends Like These - geen downloads nodig. The final Judge John Hodgman opportunity for us to ask you to join us at MaximumFun.org/join. Okay. Judge John Hodgman listeners know it’s SETTLED LAW that a hot dog is NOT a sandwich. But it really brought home that, you know, people's lives are entwined in this community, and I think in a very special, unique, and happy way. [Other people are laughing quietly. And I was like, "I'm in. John Hodgman is the author of More Information Than You Require. Have your pressing issues decided by Famous Minor Television Personality John Hodgman, Certified Judge. Acclaimed journalist Jake Tapper explains what actually happened, who got away with what and how both sides, Democrats and Republicans, plotted to steal the presidency in 2000. [Jesse laughs quietly.] Go get—go get—go get a—sorry, I'm done with all these feelings. Is it the rule-breaking, or the embarrassment of being caught? Follow @judgejohnhodgman on Instagram to view evidence from the cases tried in court. I, Podius became one of the most excitingly fun, [stifles a chuckle] weird, unexpectedly great things that both Elliott and I—and I dare say Jordan as well—felt that we had the pleasure to be a part of. Press release from Farmer John's Hot Dogs about breaking ties with Dodger Stadium, because... they supplied the hot dogs? John is personally on Instagram at @johnhodgman. And I said, "Great." This classic play has been translated before, but only into a pallid approximation of the original joual. Found insideThis is the late 1990s, and even if the Hollywood Video in Ames poses an existential threat to Video Hut, there are still regular customers, a rush in the late afternoon. Like, is always constantly moving around, and—god, and you know, just—standing next to Sean, you're like—you don't know what's gonna happen. Is that just 'cause you keep putting Dracula teeth on people on Instagram? [Sean and/or Casey laughs, John stifles laughter.] For the past 10 years, actor, author and humorist John Hodgman has hosted the podcast "Judge John Hodgman" where he helps friends, roommates and romantic couples negotiate their long-standing quibbles: Things like: "Which one of us is loading the dishwasher right?" Throughout the years, John's discovered some deeper throughlines about gender roles and power dynamics. As his employer, I can confirm that. So, you know, Sean was all over the GameStop... thing recently. Before I honestly had any idea who she was. ", "Just remember, BYOT: Bring Your Own Thermos. If you'd like John Hodgman to solve your pressing issue, simply email it, along with your phone number, to [email protected]. 14 Judge John Hodgman Spotify If you love to pass judgement on your friends and family, or just need an impartial party to help settle your petty disputes, Judge John Hodgman is here for you. And what form does this bother take? We don't need to—we don't need to be worried about what farmer will be bringing them to the stadium. I pondered the notion of stopping by that Costco to procure the dogs, but at that point it seemed like too much work. 50/50 when you describe it. And... he frequently has little antics he likes to pull when we go to the Dodgers games that make me incredibly uncomfortable! You can sit in the stands and—and watch the ocean waves, and not watch the baseball. So Sean and I are good friends—. Probably—you're on the website! "Sandwiched," the adjective, follows the sandwich! Lauren says: "Instead of replacing dirty placemats, my husband turns them over and uses, quote, 'the B side,' unquote." Don't—don't write me letters. You have kept me company, and I'm grateful to the chance to keep you company. It's calming and therapeutic. Tapping For When We Want Others To Change from Tapping Q & A - Getting the most out of tapping and EFT on Podchaser, aired Wednesday, 18th December 2019. If you can believe it. And I think you should be considerate of that! Sean and Casey, you may be seated. _[_Someone laughs.] "I listened to the Memory Palace—" —a former MaxFun show— "—at three AM in an empty station, waiting for a train to take me home. Like, so... by such a comfortably wide margin the worst year of my life, and I—and you guys have... all—you know, when I say "you guys" I mean John and Jen, but I also mean our litigants, and I also mean everyone listening, have lightened my load this year, in so many ways. There's only a couple days left! Details. If you’d like John Hodgman to solve your pressing issue, please contact us HERE. Terry Maggert is an Author. Go to MaximumFun.org/join. Well, let me say in defense of that beer, that the top is a frozen slushy of beer. Do you have a case that would be good for the live show? A writer's journey with the fan bases of Phish and Insane Clown Posse describes his unexpected discovery of how both groups have tapped the human need for community, a finding that coincided with his diagnosis of bipolar disorder. About John Hodgman's TED Talk. 'Cause there's nothing grosser than that. Who are your brothers, Shifty Sean? Stephen Colbert is out there every week pretty much, stumping for the hotdog being a sandwich. It's—it's bogus! Start thinking about a better way to keep those hot dogs warm, that do not require transfer from a thermos to tinfoil. Go to MaximumFun.org. And it took me a while to find the distinction. And by the way, Farmer John is owned by Smithfield. I mean, I am not here how to tell you how to bring hot dogs into Dodger Stadium, but I'll go ahead and tell you how to bring hot dogs into Dodger Stadium: ten-gallon hat. I love basebaaall! I am at @put.this.on. We all eat meat, or filling, in bread. I shall never speak of this again. There was a ton of incredibly friendly intimate banter about, uh, what is it called? Which is how Sean strides into Dodger Stadium. I—I started it because I thought, "Well, if I'm gonna pour myself into something, I oughta do it the right way.". And when you become a member, when you upgrade, or when you boost, you are showing your support for this community. Because this small, little bit does matter. Divide and serve with a cup of soup–ibility! I listened to Sawbones while eating dinner, despite that week’s slightly nauseating topic." This is the Bible populated by angry loners, hypochondriacs, and reluctant prophets who fear for their sanity, for readers of Sarah Vowell and the books of David Sedaris. Basically, a Bible that readers can finally, genuinely relate to. But at Dodger Stadium, a woman's job is to stop Sean from getting the foamy Kirin beer. So let's take a break from the courtroom to do that. I realize it. One of those people just helped me move. Go ahead, Judge Hodgman! Histories. As well as sealed water bottles. Maybe it is. And then Jesse came in, having just used the—the same egg cooker! Found insideThis book is not simply a collection of these interviews, but instead something more wondrous: a running narrative of the world’s most recognizable names working through the problems, doubts, joys, triumphs, and failures we all experience ... But did you save it for the air? When—was that you who shot the video, Casey? Sorry, Jesse. But one thing that I have learned from doing this podcast, [stifles laughter] is that if every white man thinks he is the center of the universe, it might mean that none of us is. The Power Struggle Behind Who Does The Dishes with John Hodgman September 10, 2021 - 48:30 For the past 10 years, actor, author and humorist John Hodgman has hosted the podcast "Judge John Hodgman" where he helps friends,. Sean says that he is well within his rights! Casey's very lazy. They just—"I'm renting this from the folks at Hobie.". Everybody brings hot dogs to the office in their pockets! [More quiet laughter.] I mean, not only is this among the smartest group of people who are almost exclusively younger than me that I've encountered. We'll talk to you next time on the Judge John Hodgman podcast. [John laughs.] Get us to 25,000 new, upgrading, and boosting members, and we'll do—I—I won't be a jerk about it. So he tries to walk down the steps to go to the lower level, and the attendant says—, [Vin Scully impression] "Hey, sports fans! Found insideA founding member of the Beyond the Fringe British comedy group collects his career writings, including his satirical journalism pieces for "Private Eye," his monologues, numerous essays, and highlights from his partnership with Dudley ... ], Anyway, she says, "You need to have a ticket down there." It's not just a weird office. You can break a lot of rules at six-foot-six. I mean it is meat inside of bread. And look, again, you have some heroes on your side. Maybe you need something special to flip the switch and get you to get out your phone, or get out your computer, and go to MaximumFun.org/join. But they are people from many, many different walks of life, and backgrounds. Jesse Thorn is the host and producer of Bullseye and Jordan, Jesse, Go!, and the co-host and producer of Judge John Hodgman.He's also the founder and proprietor of the Maximum Fun podcast network. PLUS!: This paperback edition includes a special self-expanding fold-out edition of THE TAXONOMY OF COMPLETE WORLD KNOWLEDGE, which you have probably never seen before because it has been carefully hidden. UNTIL NOW. Have your pressing issues decided by Famous Minor Television Personality John Hodgman, Certified Judge. I mean, John—as a Giants fan, I would argue that there is no greater foundational evil than simply building a stadium in which the Dodgers play. It’s a podcast network full of funny, informative, delightful shows. Have your pressing issues decided by Famous Minor Television Personality John Hodgman, Certified Judge. "Howdy!" I don't know! They've been part of this community; they've grown up in this community. Let's go get something. Liezl Estipona/Courtesy of Maximum Fun hide caption toggle caption As that would mean I am the center of the universe! The Judge John Hodgman podcast invites followers of its Facebook page to name upcoming episodes based on short descriptions of each episode's premise. If a hotdog is a sandwich, then all is sandwich, and that's not fair. That's what the community is. They are only available in the MaxFunDrive. —entitled, "Say it ain’t so, Vin: Farmer John Dodger Dogs are no more," filed by Bill Shaikin at 4 a.m. Pacific Time. You're just living your upper-deck life yourself! And it's—it's really important that we remember all the people who you don't hear every day. It is not a sandwich. There's no way for us to make something that is perfect for every single one of those people. Is it worth it? And by the way, anyone who steps to me with the argument that sandwiches are sandwiches because things are sandwiched in them? This American Life receives an emergency transmission from a rooftop somewhere in New York City, where John Hodgman reports on the true-life origins of Christmas traditions. Judge John Hodgman Podcast fans has 2,753 members. 150 episodes. Is this the one thing? John Hodgman's Today in the Past podcast is now The Judge John Hodgman Podcast. Oh, boy. Sean was under the—the notion for a while that you could just walk down to the lower level without a ticket. So two dudes in a dorm or chatroom can show each other how clever they are? In the past I've taken on the likes of Judge John Hodgman, who opposed my position on hot dogs.In this week's episode, Peter Kim, executive director of the Museum of Food and Drink (MOFAD), joins me live onstage at South By Southwest in Austin, Texas, to debate the true definition of a sandwich. [John and Casey laugh. Just an—a nice, good boy—are you an only child, Casey? And he's just kinda weaving his shoulders around the entire time. Let's hit up Eastside Italian Deli, get some sandwiches with some... Now that I know some of the tricks of the trade, I could get a sub sandw—oh, even better than this. Stuff You Should Know is hosted by two podcasters who first met while working as senior editors at HowStuffWorks.com, Josh Clark and Charles Wayne "Chuck" Bryant.. Clark was a host of the show since the beginning, and before Bryant took over the co-hosting duties Clark was joined by several other editors. I guarantee you'll find at least one you love. And all you need is a forged ticket. I imagine Sean with all the buns underneath a ten-gallon hat. You could argue that the dictionary definition of a sandwich includes a hotdog. And as far as I can tell, not a Dracula. Found insideNEW YORK TIMES EDITORS’ CHOICE • A deeply reported, searingly honest portrait of the death penalty in Texas—and what it tells us about crime and punishment in America “If you’re one of those people who despair that nothing changes ... My instinct is that you are applying it to get out of trouble. And I know that there's—you know, there's no way for me to personally know every member of the audience of Maximum Fun. Five-nine? Patrick: [Chuckles.] But Sean... cannot be putting those hot dogs in that thermos anymore. Casey says that Sean’s antics at baseball games cause great stress. [More laughter.] I mean, I think Casey's—like he's saying, he's very much a rule follower, and it's by the book, and I'm looking for loopholes, and I also like finding rules that don't make sense and that are meant to be broken. _[_Sean laughs.] If this were a situation more like the Metrodome when you were a kid, and when you and Sean wandered down to the lower level, no one stopped you... would you feel the same way? So I think that when Sean says that you—you know, you might gain something from his Sean-antics... you can explore for yourself whether you think that there is truth there or not! I'm Bailiff Jesse Thorn. John Hodgman: Well, you know, as someone who grew up, kind of a, feeling that I was a feminist and b, at the same time also feeling like all sides are equal and everything is fine, and there's no, there are no basic power imbalances, even in simple conversation—like 10 years of doing Judge John Hodgman, there's a lot of data points. Couple of MaxFunDrives ago, I got on a little idea spree. 'Cause we have here Casey, who is truly the picture of a—a young John Hodgman. But now I feel like, why is there not psychotherapy at baseball games? Which is not a good thing to do. This podcast is now a Simone Biles stan account. [Stifles laughter.] The focus on the thermos was taking everyone's attention away from the fact that you were using chopsticks to root hot dogs out of it. Do it! You're using the premise to prove itself, which is the true meaning of begging the question. And it's the only place in the continental United States where you can buy that. [Both stifle laughter.]. Beard stubble, shower hair, Friendsgiving, sleeping while listening to podcasts, the difference between SUVs and trucks, and more! But I did do some quick Wikipedia research on Karl Popper's concept of falsifiability, and I appreciate it. There's other things I could probably—[laughs]—bring up, but that's the kind of way he lives his life, and I appreciate that about him! And it really—you know, I really have been thinking a lot this year about the community, and the play that we get to—interplay we get to have with each other. "I know therapy is good intrinsically, but I can't seem to get myself there. You're lost in the mix! How to listen to Judge John Hodgman. The thing to remember about Dodger Stadium, too, is it's built in Chavez Ravine. And he is very smart! In front of a live audience in 2015, Dan staked his bold claim that the hot dog is indeed a sandwich, while comedian and ersatz judge John Hodgman argued the opposing position. What else? Our goal as a network is to reach 28,000 new, upgrading, and boosting members. The community, which is the theme of this MaxFunDrive. And we may, in fact, want to spend a little more time at recognizing each other's humanity in real ways, rather than fighting on the Internet about hotdogs and sandwiches, a thing that does not matter to anyone!
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